We’ve been engaged 2 months and the wedding is set for December 5th. The plan was to not live together until after the marriage, but I got a job transfer and had to move several states away so we decided to move in together and now that we live together she wants to have sex. I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t have sex again to marriage and she’s says we’re engaged and we live together so it shouldn’t be a big deal but it is. So here’s what happened to me: I’m 17 and at a house party. This is the year I come out of my awkward phase in high school, and I’m actually considered cool. Girls start talking to me and one even wants to go upstairs and you know. After that, the same thing happened to me, twice. I was a virgin, so this was like the best night of my life. 3 girls, 1 night! And it was all good until all 3 of them come to me and say I’m pregnant with your kid. I felt so stupid and like my life was over. Here I was, 17 with 3 kids being pinned on me. That year sucked for me. My family was beyond mad. I was so lost and visited my mother’s grave. I sat there for hours just thinking about how all my dreams were gone and then at that moment, I swore I wouldn’t have sex again until marriage. I came to the conclusion that I was too young and irresponsible to be having sex, or I wouldn’t have been in that mess. So after the babies were born, DNA tests reveal that only 1 of the 3 kids were mine, the one I have with my fiancee now. We started exclusively dating afterwards and I told her, I didn’t want to have sex and she was fine with it and now she’s not. It may seem like nothing now since she’d be the only woman I’m sleeping with, but I made a promise and that’s important to me, even if it was only to myself.
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Don’t get married young…
Come on man! Cut her some slack! You’re absolutely certain you’re going to be married to her! Youre engaged! That’s practically married! I don’t see the problem especially if you us protection.
Yes, cause things worked out so well for you last time you had sex.
If your not ready to give to have sex now, then wait till your ready. Don’t do something you will regret. Your needs matter as much as her needs.
Think about it this way, you want to do everything for your women, but if she can’t wait… it may not be. She needs to be patient and understand.
You’ve got less than a month to wait.
Edit: Correction, you don’t have that long to wait though I am sure it might seem to be a long time. You’ll understand when you are older.
If you two cannot wait that long, that shows a lack of self-control and discipline.
Sex is an adult activity with adult consequences. If you are not adult enough to accept both accountability and responsibility for your chosen adult actions, then you should not be having sex.
Now you have to ask yourself some questions. What do you value? What are your priorities? What risks are you willing to take? What are the consequences of giving into your lusts now? What are the consequences of waiting until marriage?
Your relationship depends upon the answers to these questions. You’ve got less than a month to go. There is still plenty of time to call the wedding off. It’s a risk. Go ahead and have sex…then get the wedding called off for whatever reason. How would you feel about it?
It’s your life. With what decisions/actions can you live?
What is your point, exactly? Married people can still have unintended and unwanted pregnancies. Contraception, not stupid vows!
Stay true to your morals. I know how hard it’ll be, but it’s definitely worth it if you hold back on sex until later… later being the honeymoon.
All I can say is, always base your judgement on sound reason, if you think its not yet time, then you shouldn’t do it. Wait until your’e ready and comfortable again.